Today in the car I was listening to Katie Couric's book The Best Advice I Ever Got. In it, Christina Applegate tells the story of breaking her foot on stage during a preview performance of Sweet Charity. Doctors told her the bone would take so long to heal that she would not be able to do the show at all. She was desperate for a different outcome, and called her spiritual mentor, the Reverend Michael Beckwith. He told her to envision her foot healing quickly and perfectly. He said to her, "You do not have the luxury of negative thought."
Applegate writes, "Every day I participated in the healing of that bone. I felt those negative thoughts coming through and told them to shove it! I kept my eye focused on the task at hand. I did not have the luxury of negative thought; of listening to the lies we so often tell ourselves; of being talked out of success by my fears...And although I occasionally falter and my mind tries to convince me otherwise, it was those words that helped fuse a bone together at record speed."
This story really leapt out at me today, as recently I have been overly luxuriating in negative thoughts of all kinds. And although I do not have an entire Broadway cast relying on me to dance for two hours on a broken foot, I do have four little people looking to me for love and leadership every day. It is no small task to engage in the fixing of our own broken souls, and much more difficult to motivate ourselves to seek healing just for our own sakes. But I have really seen lately how my own mood and attitude toward myself impacts my ability to love and care for the people around me. So in that sense, taking care of myself is not just good for me, but for everyone I love as well. This is advice we are given every time we fly--secure your own oxygen mask before helping others with theirs.
So I'm going to start asking myself these questions. What is my current soul-healing task, and how can I keep my eye focused on it? What successes are my fears trying to talk me out of? Who can I become if I stop indulging in the luxury of negative thought?
Maybe I'll be seeing you on Broadway.
Dr Preece has a plaque in his office that asks, "what would you do if you knew you could not fail?" I often wonder about that, but I always seem to let the fear of failure win. Another quote comes to mind - "Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will." That is a truth in my world and it often shames me. I too want to tell fear and negativity to shove it!
ReplyDeleteKaren, I know it seems to you that you always let the fear of failure win, but that is not true! You are a fighter, and I see you just keep fighting and never give up.
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